Random Musings

So I'm sitting at the library, just kinda sorta musing on life and events in general. Here are some results:

1) If a problem can't be solved by using either a cricket bat or a shovel, then that problem has to be as big as Godzilla.

2) You should never be killed by a zombie. They can't run.

3) Job interviews would probably go better if someone either has a herald, or talks like Beowulf.

4) Shenanigans should be attempted on a daily basis. Success on a weekly basis.

5) If you don't find Disney movies heartwrenching, are you even human?

6) Everyone should have a fort in the woods. With a password.

7) The Irish are brilliant when they are being witty. Everyone should memorize a proverb in order to live a sarcastic life.

8) The world would be a better place if it had more foam sword fights. Like a foam sword fight.... on Wall Street.

9) Diet drinks are stupid. I don't care. You don't get happiness out of Diet Coke. You get satisfaction, which you can get better from water. Don't drink diet anything.

10) I should not be allowed in public.

11) I should be President. I would do a better job.

12) Jurrasic Park needs to be an actual event. With Tyranosaurus Rex rides the eventual goal.

13) You made it this far?

14) Middle names should be used as jokes. My son's shall be adventure. So that he will know his purpose in life.

15) When in doubt, break a glass bottle. Shattering makes everything feel better.

I guess that's all I've got for now. I feel philosophical now.

Holla!